Saturday, September 29, 2012

Growing up and learning that life will always change--He never will.

Friends!
Well, it's been almost two full months since I have gotten on here. I swear I go through these phases where I am like "Oh my gosh, I am going to blog this and that and every day!" and then I go through phases of like, "Wow, my life is just ehh. Why do I want to even bother sharing about it?"
But at the end of the day I am reminded of the whole reason I write in the first place-- I want my life stories to bring glory to God and I want whatever I do to point back to that. This blog is about looking for the little pockets of sunshine all throughout our day-to-day lives and then looking up to the one who blesses us with that sunshine...something I am daily striving to do.

SO back to whatever it is I was going to write about when I got on here hahhaah.

Oh yeah... I have moved out! :)
Crazy? Yes. Extremely fast? Yes. Scary beyond all reason? Yes. SO MUCH FUN? Absolutely.

I am now calling a little Oceanfront condo in Virginia Beach 'Home'. I have a wonderful roommate who is just so much fun and who I know is going to be a wonderful friend in the coming months. We are in the greatest area! I can run in the mornings on the boardwalk, I can drive thirty seconds in either direction and be at a grocery store, at night when her and I get off work, we can walk around and look for little places to just go eat and have fun, and right now I am currently enjoying a steaming cup of Kona coffee (my favorite) at the Bad Ass Coffee Shop right behind our condo complex. Ahhhh! It's just so much fun. We have been here for about a week now, and yet even last night we were driving around and just saying to each other that it still feels kind of surreal. But we are beyond excited to be here. We both love the beach so much and we are very similar in alot of ways, so that has made figuring out what food to buy, where to go hang out, and how to decorate the condo very easy indeed lol. I am so blessed!

Moving out of my parent's home has been hard. Like really super duper hard. So many emotions and feelings that I never expected to encounter have been bombarding me. Me and my family all agreed that moving out was a good thing, yet still that initial sadness and just general panic is still there ahah. My first night on my own was so scary. My roommate was out for the night, so I was left to brave the first night in the condo on my own. It was quiet. I mean don't get me wrong, it's never really quiet with all the jets always flying overhead and the cars going here and there...but that 'Wow I am the only human being in this house' kind of quiet. It took me all of 3 minutes to discover that I hate being alone. But I remembered something my Mommy always said to me and I decided to follow her advice that night. 'When you are confused and just have no idea what to do and you feel like you don't know anything...stick to what you do know." So on that new, scary, and just generally lonely night, I stuck to what I did know. I pulled out my fiddle and just played my heart out for an hour right there in my living room. Then I turned on my Crooners music and cleaned everything haha. I am so like my mom--when I am stressed out or anxious, I clean lol. I took a shower, lit some candles, and then just read in my room. Little things that I do know. Things I have always done-- that brought me comfort and a little peace that night.
I am so happy for the new season I am in. Yeah, the first week has been rough. Hahha it didn't take me long to get to the point where I drove all the way home to Chesapeake and just plopped down in the middle of the kitchen floor at my parent's house and just sobbed to my mom while she made dinner. I literally did that. I was exhausted, freaking out, mad that grocery shopping is so expensive, missing my family like crazy, beyond excited to be setting out on my own, thrilled that I live at the beach, worrying about bills and work hours...
Yet I know Jesus was sitting on that floor with me. He knows. He knows the roller coaster of emotions that I am going through and all the feelings that are just always coming. I am ready to grow up. I am ready to set out on the great adventure that God has planned for me. I am ready to just experience life as an adult and learn along the way. Life is crazy and confusing and sometimes overwhelming...but my God is the same yesterday, today and forever!! He will never change. He is the same God today in my scary growing up years as he was in my care-free little girl years.  He's got me, and as long as I keep that truth in the forefront of my mind... I think I'm gonna be just fine :)

Yep, I get to see sunsets like this almost every night.

A verse that is really getting me through right now.

My first morning devotion view!!

 

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